Reality Sucks

I remember the years I spent in college. I had a lot of cash to throw around, I drove a fancy car, and parking was free and plentiful. And I’m sure it’s even better today. General Motors knows this of course, and wants to save college kids from the humiliation of riding a bike. I mean really, who rides their bike at school? People who suck, that’s who. If you bought into the whole “cycling is a whole lot of fun, good for you and the environment” B.S., don’t worry. GM has a debt program for you!

Reality Sucks
Reality Sucks – GM ad running in college newspapers

It’s time to stop pedaling, and start driving, says GM. If you’re on the fence about giving up your bike, the League of American Bicyclists might help you decide.

If you are a student looking to add tens of thousands of dollars of long term debt, care little about the environment, and want to lump two tons of steel around campus while paying through the nose for insurance, gas, and parking…General Motors has got a perfect deal for you. Bonus: it’ll make you fat and unhealthy! All you have to do is give up that dorky bicycle that’s easy to use, practically free, gets you some exercise and is actually fun to ride.

But riding a bike around campus is not the only place that bikes sucks. They’re awful for commuting as well. Here are 9 reasons why you should never bike to work over on

More on this socially responsible ad campaign over on Bike Portland.

Disclaimer: As a responsible corporate citizen, General Motors is dedicated to protecting human health, natural resources and the global environment.

4 thoughts on “Reality Sucks

  1. Here’s what you get if you send GM an email regarding the ad campaign…

    My email:
    This advertising campaign is really not in good taste. For a mode of transportation that is government subsidized to tell those of us who like to ride bicycles and walk we’re losers is unbelievable. Be sure to forward this to someone getting a million dollar bonus at GM this year!

    We apologize that our College Discount advertising campaign has offended you in any way. Campaigns and slogans are designed to excite and entice eligible GM College Discount participants to purchase a GM Vehicle and are not intended to offend anyone. We will forward your complaint to our marketing team.

  2. Damn. I didn’t even get to bitch at them before they pulled it!
    As a former member of the Michigan Vehicula, I once believed the corporate lies and did not ride a bike. Now that I have been to the bicycle promised land, I can only try to help others find redemption. You are not a dork, you are a Lycra (or baggy shorts) clad avenger! They may throw taunts and apples at us through the windows, but their words (and fruit) will never hurt us.
    However, their bumpers on the other hand . . . .

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